at Lake of the Clouds

We were talking about alarm clocks and what to do when someone forgets to deactivate their alarm. We discussed methods for coping when you are not ready to get out of bed. I decided to share my noise-blocking technique.

My family and I were hiking in the White Mountains, along the Appalachian Trail, and we stayed overnight at the AMC hut at Lake of the Clouds. These huts are great. They give you a bunk and a blanket for sleeping, they feed you dinner and breakfast. This one is just below the Washington summit, and has a beautiful view. We ate barley stew and settled in to sleep in a room with fifteen other people. Then this guy started to snore.

It wasn't normal snoring, either. It was loud. It was also irregular. My uncle was in the bunk below me, and I heard him grumbling. Eventually, I saw him stick his hiking stick out and poke the guy in the foot. Tentatively at first, but the guy's reaction was to give a rumbling, deafening snort, so my uncle jabbed him harder. To no avail. After a lot of twisting and turning, I figured out that if I jam my head into the pillow and the heel of my hand into my open ear, I could block most of the noise, so I fell asleep in this position.

The next morning, I woke up, looked around, saw the grey flannel lump of the guy still snoring. Then I saw the empty bunks where my family should have been. They were seriously nowhere. They had left me on top of a mountain. It took me a good five minutes to collect myself, to stop panicking. When I walked out into the dining room, there they were: asleep on the floor and the dining room tables.

Don't forget: if some guy in your hut is snoring, jam one side of your head into your pillow, and jam the heel of your hand into your open ear. This way, you can sleep in your cozy bunk, instead of on the dirty floor of a mountain hut. I think this will also work for situations in which someone's alarm clock is going off.

milk teeth

I had almost forgotten this story. I think it's one of the only distinct and narrative memories I am still carrying from fifteen years of playing sports. So, freshman year, we were getting ready for the spring break tournament in California, and we went to an indoor softball field to get some practice on dirt, instead of the field house flooring, instead of the ice outside.

It was dark and early morning, and we were working on base running. I was standing in foul territory off third base, arms crossed, zoning out in my batting helmet, waiting for my turn to be picked off by our catcher. The runner on base took her lead and immediately dove back to the bag as the catcher stood up to throw. The ball glanced off the runner's helmet, uncaught by the third baseman, and rolled away. Everyone jogged over to the runner, still lying on her stomach in the base path, a little dazed. It was a second before I noticed the third baseman, kneeling off to the side, staring at her hands cupped in front of her. I walked over and crouched down beside her. I noticed the blood spatters in her palms and in the dirt. I didn't know what to do, so I told her to spit, vaguely thinking it wasn't nice to swallow blood. She spit, more blood came out, and then her teeth.

The ball had ricocheted off the runner's helmet and hit her in the mouth. Her two front teeth had been knocked clear out. They lay together on the dirt, curved into each other like lovers or twin moons. They were longer than you'd imagine. Maybe two inches? and not bloody. a pair of white slivers, two pearl spears.

I was horrified, and I told her to spit again. I remember touching her hair and trying to signal the trainer to come over. She hadn't seen her teeth yet, she hadn't realized what had happened. When she did notice, she started wailing and cursing. Everyone came running, and everyone recoiled at the glistening bone quotation marks punctuating the brown infield. Someone shouted for water and someone shouted for milk. The owner of the place came out with a cup of milk, and delicately scooped her teeth inside. The trainer called the ambulance, and she went to the hospital. They managed to reinsert the teeth, though her mouth was swollen for a long time, and she didn't play that season.

don't forget: store lost teeth in milk, not water. The calcium protects the enamel from deteriorating. I'm not 100% sure, but I think it'll work for most bones.